Today we are going to talk about the real reason I am no longer a raw vegan. And we are also going to talk about dealing with weight gain after an extreme diet, finding true overall health in balanced living and most importantly for me – we are going to talk about taking responsibility as an online content creator.
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I have struggled my weight and skin for most of my life and was very self-conscious about it. I was bullied for it which amongst other things led to my depression, constantly yo-yo dieted, had anxiety about many of these issues and also had health problems with my cholesterol at my highest weight. About 5 years ago I became vegan, which had a tremendously positive effect on my overall health, a year after that I started focusing on eating a lot more “clean” healthy vegan foods and worked out a lot. I felt great and I was probably in the best shape of my life so far, but that wasn’t enough for me. During the following year, I transitioned to a completely raw vegan diet which meant that besides no animal products & gluten that I previously cut out, now I didn’t eat anything with oil, salt, grains, legumes, processed foods or if it was cooked in any way. I ate mainly fruit, vegetables, leafy greens and small amounts of nuts and seeds for about a year. I lost more weight, my skin cleared up more than ever and mostly I felt in control.
After about a year as a raw vegan and during a stressful time I experienced emotionally, I lost my period. I also felt very ungrounded, almost disconnected from life in a way. It came into play with me being disgusted by anything that was not “clean”, “pure” or “high vibrational”. Everyday human activities like walking in a busy city street or hanging out with friends felt dirty to me. This went on for a couple of months during which I told myself that the problem was not with me but with the world, and also many raw vegan YouTubers talk about losing your period and seeing the world as dirty as a positive sign, which gave me validation. But the point where I couldn’t be in denial anymore was when the relationships in my life started to suffer, I pulled away from the people I loved most… and just when it all started crumbling down, I traveled to India for a month.
During that trip, I got extreme food poisoning and funny enough the only food I was able to stomach was white rice with tahini. I was terrified at first, but I have to say that that first meal of rice after more than a year of raw food was heavenly. Looking back, that comforting meal on the roof of the guesthouse in Alleppey India marked the beginning of my healing.
After a couple of months of eating cooked foods, my period came back and my body slowly balanced. I also started therapy which helped a lot. Now almost two years later and after a lot of healing I can see that my obsession around physical cleansing was a way for me to try to do what’s right for myself, but now I know that what I truly needed all along was compassion towards all parts of me.
Nothing is completely good or bad and that I definitely have many good habits from my time as a raw vegan, like the fact that I am much more attentive to myself, I enjoy moving my body and strengthening it and I love healthy vegan foods simply because they make me feel good. But my focus these days is balance, I am not strict and do enjoy just slugging around and the simple pleasures of life like vegan pizza 🙂
This was not easy for me to share, but I am grateful for all of this experience because if this story helped even one of you out there, it happened for a reason. Thank you for being part of this path and allowing me to grow and change with you, I love and appreciate you guys more than I could ever express in words, we are truly in this together.
Much love always,
Facebook: Shir Levi
About my YouTube channel:
Here I share everything I learn on my journey through life in hopes to inspire you. If you are into overall wellness, spiritual growth, mindful living and above all – learning to embrace all aspects of this present moment, you will feel right at home here. And I would love for you to join me by subscribing to my channel.
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Some of my favorites:
The Never-Ending Story by Michael Ende
Siddhartha by Hermann Hesse
The Highly Sensitive Person by Elaine Aron
Magical music in the video:
Going Home Without You By Lost Odyssey